Share of today

An attractive handsome, Jason Chen possesses good voice whenever in the melody. I can't stand my heart feel to him. Oopss sexy baby! Muahaha... Indeed, the duet follows here is the watch of two handsome. Falling in love :)

The wonders

Friendship or any relationship are always a fragile matter. It can be hot and tight at first and then be ended cool and loose. When everything is still in fresh, you find everything fine and attracting. When attractions come, explorations spell to make the force of attractions stronger. You find him/her there to share with you, grow with you, to secure you and happiness are always there to do. The differences or deviations that initially found ain't longer to split or distract when everything are in fresh mode.  Problems wasn't a problem from a starting point as if it makes things exciting to explore and learn. Days by days when it comes to be a routine, everything changes again. It may be an interesting if we learnt and accepted from the differences. It may make the distance further if we stand strong on our point to move onwards. It's all the reality that either makes us move and change or static to probably lose up everything.

I was back from meeting up another two good friends of mine in NS. We shared again our progress and there's 3 different persons with 3 different stories updating. And the only unchange and remains is me. Their loves which I found sweet finally come to not working finally. I saw and see the changes. One want to break up; one was broken up and me eager to have one ending up having none. Funny scene when three of us sitting together and complained. What I want is simple enough to bring me and show me directions but give me some spatial freedoms. I feel the hardships of a girl being broken up. I think I won't simply say that as being together always bring lots of hard works. The harder is being single. A girl being single always pity of own for not being employed with her king of heart. A girl being single always make silly mistakes and end up setting down by own every time. A girl being single always feel lonely and tell to themselves being tough. A girl being single when seeing couples on the road, they make complaints and compares. A girl being single felt pity on themselves and end up being very tough even they are not. A girl being single would have to optimistically comfort themselves for being free. But a girl like me is no way of being independence. It spells eager when seeing the atmosphere. But feelings and how we grab from meetings are always the criterion. I would say I have no sense. hahaha. How bad and silly I sound to be, right? And, how nice if there is someone secretly liking me. Aih, I'm super emo now! Blank blank ceiling,silly me! What shall I do for my blurry wish?

Directions

It spells tension when everything have to be settled on own. It spells lost when you have no where,no direction. The graduation happiness stands only few days and it spells disasters if I am still jobless. The beautifully planned of everything just gone like that because reality spells the cruel! I am an adult to be independent. Oh my goodness!

Graduation year 2011

   It's the fifth graduation in my life time if counted from kindergarten. It's complicated whenever we come to the end of being student. A little happiness with a little sadness and add on a little of feeling bad with contradicts. I'm happy for the hard works paid finally to pass as an undergraduate. And the same time, I'm feeling sad of going to split apart. The days we had together no matter how hatred we were towards one another would finally relief. It may, because of we ain't together anymore to face each other? Or, everything should in mannerly ending well and nice. As for me, happy always comes first.

My house condition when I left in year 2007

   Recalling four years ago, it was a funny scene when I was keeping my things. Tears was rolling down my cheeks in front of my mummy and kept on complaining how bad I would be if I was getting apart from my parents. It's the silly immature doings by me. Father brought all of us for my very last dinner at hometown before coming over to this hustle bustle city, Kuala Lumpur to pursue my study. I remembered I was crying when I had my first spoon of the dinner on the day. Father was acting cool with a little laughter saying that I am still belonged to the home and welcomed to the home anytime I feel bad out there. It was super touching to have a word from my cool papa. Again, my tears was rolling down like heavy rain. The moment was so hard for me to even finish up the plate of the meal. Little brother was still with us in Malaysia. He was always actively laughing on my silly acts for the splits. Anyway, I got to revenge as at last he had to leave us far apart to Seoul for his JPA. Hahahaha. I'm still not that bad if compared to him. :P The memories were still fresh in my mind that I was super nervous of my capability to be independent surviving alone out there. Keeping all the Form 6 notes to bring over here and everything that would secure me were found necessity that time. I felt the same as today, feeling bad enough to split apart from my best friends during the schooling days there. We always said how nice if my best friends were to be with me for my four years studies. Then only we won't be bored. And yea, that was always our first impression of being separated apart. Things changed over time as we grow.

My best friend living near my home

   Things were funny whenever we were still new in a bran new environment. I was very blurred of imagine how's the look of University Malaya and how am I going to survive. The first thing on this city of Kuala Lumpur impressed me was the noisy honking cultures of the citizens here. I was totally in shock and wondered that would I stand long of this culture. Mumbling deep inside my heart:" How nice my home (Alor Star) always be in beautifully presenting me the peace and fresh as compared to this noisy city? I shouldn't choose this far for my study!" Hahaha. And then, it was the registration day. We went dizzy of passing round and round the sign boards showing the University Malaya but ended up of couldn't see any entrance gates of UM. Until then we saw a Pak Guard tiring patrol the traffic in front of PJ gate. That moment is really making me nervous as I know it's time to stay alone on my own feet. We're directed to the parkings beside 1st college. Everyone of my family seemed so nice in helping me to carry my luggages to my college. Shocking me again was the outlook of my accommodation. The yellowish wall of the 2nd college, the antique appearance of the college and the not so nice beds totally spoiled my moods. These views were just adding the complexions to my separating sadness. Choosing my own locker, every of my family members helped me to arrange my things. My cute active ah gong started the chat with my roommates' family and trying to help me in asking them to try to take care of each others. Hahaha. Chats were there but I could only spell the sad and bad. Out of no choice, I got the double storey bed. I tried to sleep on it and it sounded: "eeik...eik...". It seemed to be fallen down anytime. I was wondered that would it be able to sustain the fat of mine? Start the compares again :" How nice I was if I was at home. Sure, I was served better!" and cried soundly. Soon after the bell of separations with my family rang. I followed them till the entrance of 2nd college and had my hugs to everyone of my family. I cried louder than before and the tears couldn't stop as if it was out of control. Oh my god, I was all alone and going to finish everything on own. I started to find my hometown's friend staying the same college as mine, Ah Kang. I started sms'ing my very best friends to ask for their days in their universities. And, I just thought I am the only pity as I not even knew how to take the LRT, buy the bus ticket back and the location of UM's gates to let me out. The moments were so hard with the orientations which seemed super silly. I was not given a chance to keep in touch with my family for one week and being physically tortured by the PMs. Waking up early in the morning for the exercises, hard trainings for the "Saps", getting scold for things that we're not in faults by PMs and loud screaming in the hall towards other colleges were so hard for me. I had no idea to continue that anymore. I kept on complaining to ah Kang when I met her. I was crying again and said I wanted to go back home. Hahaha. Her sister brought me out of UM and went round the areas showing me the 9th college, routes to ss14, starbuck @ mid valley and mamak @ Jln. Gasing. Thankful to her and her sis. I still remembered the moment I escaped from the college's event with ah Kang as cannot wait going back home. We sat in the LRT for almost every stations and KLCC as to spend our day in waiting the moment to get in the bus back hometown.

   The very first semester in KL was totally unorganized. I was in serious sick of coughing for almost one month for not able to adapt to the new environ. The silly clinics in 12th college provided me the medicines without anti-biotic as my situation not yet worsen was the excuse. It was seriously a bad sicking moment. And remembering that my cute popo kept calling me and chat as to comfort me. Hahahaha. The days went off and I get to knew my coursemates. A group of us with almost 6-7 girls had our breakfasts, lunches, dinners and sometimes suppers during our days in 2nd college. The bads and sads were finally turned off gradually. I was getting used to the environment, making some of the new friends and taking part in the college activities. Dancing, choir and tennis (UMIT) were part of them. Hahaha, adapting to the tempo of others spelled my weaknesses and thus I was guided by seniors all the times on my performances. Days after days, the BABA group was formed with theme song "single love song (dan shen qing ge)". 3 girls of us are always the most blur persons among the coursemates. Finding the soul mate was always our objectives. Anyway, the other two BABAs had done quite well as they found theirs. Only me always the slowest. Aduhhhh!

    Happy-go-lucky was and is always my style of doing things. Play and enjoy all the times was my way of studying. Always asking for the rescues in guiding me for my exams and assignments helped me to finally pass the 8 semesters. I did remember the first time of approaching the Auto CAD software, C++, Pro-E, solidWorks, MasterCAM and etc. I was always the handing up student to seek for further explanations. I just felt I was totally not belonged to the world of engineering. Aduiiiii~ Whatever, the hard moments were over.

   Started my second year staying outside, there are another new stories. I would say everything started happily to get knowing further on each others. And the time flied, it sounded like we are in a house of happy family as we know how our coursemates staying in the same house characters and their behaving. It's also a thing to learn to accept, respect and tolerate as to go along to stay together for longer. It's a knowledge and practices for every relationships to develop. Some, we may like and some, we may dislike. And some we not even get to know how his or her thinkings. Whatever it is, I chose and choose to have myself free and out. I like having spent my times outside either in a group or being alone. It makes me to look a little strange. But what to do? I like having things like this and only the one know me well spell my life right and exact. Sorry I would say to those for not knowing each others further even spent times living together for almost 3 years. I would say thank you for the helping hands and appreciate the memories that built in me. Everything that were done had enriched my university life.

    These 4 years of studying really make me moving onwards in the learning and adapting the life of independence. Revealing the historical moment of spraining my leg at Bangunan Peperiksaan, making decision of moving outside, missing the bus back hometown, breaking down of my laptop, missing my matrics card, not doing the evaluations in permitting me to the exam and coping of myself with the final year project, it's all my growing. And the only thing I had and have never changed is my different tempo and speed of doing things. However, there are some proud doings by me too. The challenges that I took for my internship in Thailand, the part time job of spying in the bars, clubs, discotheques, internet cafes, gambling centers and premises, the part time promoter and tuition teacher were my proud achievements.

   For every moment we spent, we have to appreciate it. For every memories we built, we have to keep it tight. For every friends we made, we have to sincerely share and always be friendship forever. For every mistakes that we did, we have to sorry and make corrections. And finally, for every steps that we take, we have to consider deeply and sincerely. Appreciations make things different and wishing the best always by our sides. Good luck for the future undertakings and stay happily ever after.

Puchong Water Sport 16.4.2011

Kukup Island 14.5.2011

Final year group photo - 5.5.2011

All regarding the Gossip girl will be my recent update status

Haha!Even it's quite late to find this movie but worth it. I'm truly enjoying it!hahahahaha

The lyrics:

Mika--Happy Ending
lyrics By Erica飘飘
For recollecting the memory of Kurrama

This is the way you left me, 你就这样离开了我
I'm not pretending, 我坦然面对
No hope, no love, no glory, 没有希望没有爱没有感恩
No happy ending 也没有完美结局
This is the way that we love, 这就是我们相爱的方式
Like it's forever, 虚伪的永远之后
Then live the rest of our life 继续着生活
But not together. 相互背离

Wake up in the morning, stumble on my life 清晨醒来，蹒跚过活
Can't get no love without sacrifice 没有牺牲就没有爱
If anything should happen, I guess I wish you well 无论发生什么，我想我只希望你过得幸福
A little bit of heaven, but a little bit of hell 恍若天堂，又仿佛地狱

This is the hardest story that I've ever told 这是个苦涩的故事
No hope, or love, or glory 没有希望没有爱没有感恩
Happy endings gone forever more 永远逝去的爱
I feel as if I feel as if I'm wastin' 我感觉到我的蹉跎
And I'm wastin' everyday 蹉跎岁月

This is the way you left me, 你就这样离开了我
I'm not pretending, 我坦然面对
No hope, no love, no glory, 没有希望没有爱没有感恩
No happy ending 也没有完美结局
This is the way that we love, 这就是我们相爱的方式
Like it's forever, 虚伪的永远之后
Then live the rest of our life 继续着生活
But not together. 相互背离

2 o'clock in the morning, something's on my mind 凌晨两点，骤然惊醒
Can't get no rest; keep walkin' around 毫无睡意，坐立不安
If I pretend that nothin' ever went wrong, I can get to my sleep 倘若能欺骗自己一切照旧，我才能入睡
I can think that we just carried on 我会想象我们仍然在一起

This is the hardest story that I've ever told 这是个苦涩的故事
No hope, or love, or glory 没有希望没有爱没有感恩
Happy endings gone forever more 永远逝去的爱
I feel as if I feel as if I'm wastin' 我感觉到我的蹉跎
And I'm wastin' everyday 蹉跎岁月

This is the way you left me, 你就这样离开了我
I'm not pretending, 我坦然面对
No hope, no love, no glory, 没有希望没有爱没有感恩
No happy ending 也没有完美结局
This is the way that we love, 这就是我们相爱的方式
Like it's forever, 虚伪的永远之后
Then live the rest of our life 继续着生活
But not together. 相互背离

A Little bit of love, 只需一点点爱
little bit of love  一点点爱
Little bit of love, little bit of love……  一点点爱，一点点爱而已…

I feel as if I feel as if I'm wastin' 我感觉到我的蹉跎，蹉跎着……
And I'm wastin' everyday 蹉跎岁月

This is the way you left me, 你就这样离开了我
I'm not pretending. 我坦然面对
No hope, no love, no glory, 没有希望没有爱没有感恩
No Happy Ending. 也没有完美结局
This is the way that we love, 这就是我们相爱的方式
Like it's forever. 虚伪的永远之后
To live the rest of our life, 继续着生活
But not together.  相互背离
This is the way you left me, 你就这样离开了我
I'm not pretending. 我坦然面对
No hope, no love, no glory, 没有希望没有爱没有感恩
No Happy Ending. 也没有完美结局
This is the way that we love, 这就是我们相爱的方式
Like it's forever.  虚伪的永远之后
To live the rest of our life, 继续着生活
But not together. 相互背离
This is the way you left me, 你就这样离开了我
I'm not pretending. 我坦然面对
No hope, no love, no glory, 没有希望没有爱没有感恩
No Happy Ending. 也没有完美结局